How to talk about making an agreement?

Making an agreement with someone can be one of the greatest signs of trust and respect. Sadly, some people can feel mixed emotions about being asked to record an agreement or awkward raising the topic with a friend or partner. At agreeme, we think this shouldn't be the case and recording your agreement makes it more robust and is one of the greatest signs of respect and trust an individual can make. In this blog post, we will try and dissect the different reasons why people object and how to handle these.

Don't you trust me?

Right in at number 1, the reason for not making an agreement is around the thought that you only need to record agreements with people you don't trust. Here is why this is not only incorrect but why the reverse is true. Trust isn't about words but actions. Nothing says "you can trust me" more than making a transparent commitment to someone. Sometimes just the act of recording an agreement means it's more likely to be upheld, and if someone really doesn't want to record the agreement, they probably have no intention of honouring it.

We will figure it out as we go along!

Great in theory but terrible in practice. With all the best will in the world, these types of arrangements are destined to fail. Not because you don't want to get along, but because even two people in an agreement can be thinking in different ways, add in a few assumptions and heuristic biases, and you've got a problem growing in your adventure. You don't need to agree on everything to be set for success, but you need to clear up the essential things; otherwise, the assumption is the mother of all f**k ups.

No need to write it down. We'll remember

Did you know that eyewitness testimony to crimes is one of the weakest forms of evidence? This is because we like to think that our memories are like photographs, and once they are recorded, they will never change. But this is sadly not true. Memory doesn't do well with details, especially over time, and if it is something you talk about, it can be even worse. Our minds work with memories as "the gist of it", meaning you remember themes but not details. You will remember that you are happy with an agreement, but the details will become fuzzy. So write it down and record those agreements

It's not that important. We don't need an agreement.

Importance is a relative thing, and even though the subject of an agreement may not be of high value, the security and peace of mind of recording the agreement reduce stress and the chance of dis-agreements further down the line. Just like paying into a pension, you might find it a bind at present, but Future You will be grateful.

What do you think about making agreements? Here at agreeme, we are focused on making agreements easy and accessible with our mobile app.